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Oh hello. I am jovhelle. Chocolates and Pink and Hello Kitty are my favorite things. WAHM ang loving it.

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Words from Quote Garden.

Friday, July 23, 2010
5 Habits of a Healthy Marriage – Erma Bombeck

5 Habits of a Healthy Marriage – Erma Bombeck

“Guilt is the gift that keeps on giving,” says Bombeck. That’s not one gift you want to give your spouse – guilt is definitely not a habit of a healthy couple! But these are…

1. Learn to express anger, hurt, or frustration. An important part of married life is conflict resolution – and most couples aren’t trained to do this, says Ernest Harburg, professor emeritus at the University of Michigan. His research reveals that couples who suppress anger are twice as likely to face early death as those who express it. Getting mad without hurting your spouse is a healthy marriage habit that can improve your physical and emotional health.

2. Pick your green battles. Joining forces to affect your environment not only gives you a common goal and unites you as married couple, it’s good for the planet too. Choose an eco-battle together, such as adopting a nearby park and doing a weekly “garbage march.” Or plant a garden at home or in the community, focusing on organic fruits and veggies. Learn how to compost, and lighten the load in the landfills. Once your new behavior becomes a habit for your marriage, you can add another healthy habit – and soon you’ll be the greenest couple on the block!

3. End the day talking about your highs and lows. Make it a point to discuss the ups and downs in your marriage, family, and individual lives, and to look for the good in the bad. “During dinner we talk about what we enjoyed best and least that day,” says Tanya, a mother of three on Bowen Island, BC. “It’s a great way for our kids to listen to each other’s stories and problems, help find solutions, understand that we all experience ups and downs, relate to each other, laugh, and illustrate that life is like a rollercoaster.”

4. Make it a habit to volunteer as a married couple or family. “Contributing as a family not only helps [others], but it also strengthens the contributing family in the process,” writes Stephen Covey in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families. “Can you imagine the bonding, the sense of fulfillment, the sense of shared joy?” Volunteer opportunities include helping out annually at a camp for disabled kids, serving monthly at a food bank, or walking dogs weekly at an animal shelter.

5. Take risks and seek hidden treasure. A great habit for healthy marriages is trying new things together, such as juggling, geocaching for treasures, or making sushi. Psychology professor Leaf Van Boven from the University of Colorado explains why happiness is found in your life experiences (not your possessions). Experiences are open to positive reinterpretations, become a meaningful part of your identity, and contribute to successful relationships. When you experience something as a married couple – such as learning something new together – you build memories that you can reminisce and laugh about later. Those experiences unite you and become part of who you are as a married couple.

A final quotation about marriage from Erma Bombeck:

“People shop for a bathing suit with more care than they do a husband or wife,” said Erma Bombeck. “The rules are the same. Look for something you’ll feel comfortable wearing. Allow for room to grow.”


Tuesday, July 6, 2010
21 Ways to enjoy being a Mom

21 Ways to enjoy being a Mom
  1. When you're tired, hand your kids a brush, point to your head, and tell them to play beauty parlor. When you're really tired, pretend that you're Sleeping Beauty.
  2. Take your mother to a spa. While you're both getting seaweed wraps, tell her all your favorite memories of growing up.
  3. Take a bath with your infant. Make sure your husband is around for the handoff, so you can relax until the last minute. (Don't forget to smell your baby right afterward. Heaven!)
  4. At the end of every summer, take a family photo for the holiday card (you'll be happy to have this accomplished once December comes). Every year, add a framed 11-by-14-inch print to your front hall. Your kids will be proud now and laugh later at the funny styles.
  5. On St. Patrick's Day, dye the milk and eggs green and turn the furniture upside down so your home looks like total chaos. When your little ones wake up, tell them that the leprechauns came.
  6. The next time you have to go to a boring kiddie activity, invite another mom-friend along. Hide wine in sippy cups for the two of you to nurse undercover.
  7. Play Freaky Friday with your husband and switch roles for a day. Enjoy his renewed appreciation for his Super Mom wife.
  8. In the dead of winter, fix some snacks, get under warm quilts, and watch Happy Feet on DVD. Tell your kids you love them even more than the penguins love their chicks.
  9. Go to the beach in the off-season. Throw rocks in the water and collect shells. Put them in a vase and use it as shelf decor in your living room.
  10. Skip the Raffi and Barney. Turn your kids on to Bob Marley, They Might Be Giants, and Gwen Stefani.
  11. Take your baby out to the movies at night. (Infants love the dark, and loud trailers make them snooze immediately.) Then you can sip your soda and munch your popcorn in peace.
  12. Buy yourself that fancy watch, strand of pearls, or whatever piece of expensive jewelry you've been lusting after. Justify your purchase by rationalizing that you'll pass it down to your daughter (or son's wife) eventually.
  13. Take your kids to live music performances from very early ages. Cheap ones outdoors are great to start with in case you need to make a hasty exit (like when a diaper explodes).
  14. Use your kids as an excuse to do the things you want to do, like going to silly feel-good movies, eating mac and cheese for dinner, and jumping in the moonbounce. Use your kids as an excuse to get out of things you don't want to do, like going to a wedding or office party.
  15. Every Mother's Day, have a picture taken with your kids. Keep the photos all together - along with special cards, ticket stubs, mementos, and anything else that makes you feel good about being a mom - in a shoe box. (Of course, you must get those new shoes you love in order to do this correctly.) Every year, look through your Goddess Mom box and see how much your kids have grown.
  16. Give your kids quiet time every day. Let them learn to be by themselves with books, crayons, or blocks.
  17. Let your whole family take a day off and hang out in pj's all day long.
  18. Rent Sex and the City on DVD, and reminisce about the days when you were single and the biggest problem you had was whether the "He" of the moment was going to call. Let the romance of your youth seduce you. Then remember that, despite your freedom, all you really wanted was to fall in love and have beautiful babies.
  19. Pitch a tent in the backyard. Use it as your outdoor reading room. Or when there's a full moon, plan a family campout with sleeping bags, a transistor radio, and s'mores, of course.
  20. Invent a house fairy. Give her a name, and tell your kids that she is always watching them and counting up their good deeds.
  21. Listen for the deep, happy sighs that come after your kids play or laugh really hard. Tuck them away in your heart.

Credits to Parenting.